The Journey to Queendom
Exploring & reflecting
You’ve probably heard me talk about onions before. As in a fresh new layer being revealed. The old one was perfectly fine for its time, but you peel back another layer when you are ready to level up. The work I do with people is all about them revealing new shiny layers of their onion. In order to be the best personal style and brand mentor I can be it requires me to walk the walk and talk the talk. I’m personally on an ever-evolving journey of self-development and self-awareness; exploring and reflecting on what the universe is teaching me.
I feel like I’m in a growth phase at the moment and will be shedding the old layer soon. At the weekend, I was tidying my office up a bit (I got bored so only did about half of what I wanted to do) and I’d got a couple of card decks on my desk. I decided to give myself a reading with my Chakra Wisdom Oracle Cards (current faves) which was most pertinent, but I’m never surprised by that. I also pulled a card from my Miracles Now deck by Gabrielle Bernstein which has 62 affirmations for spiritual growth and healing which has inspired this blog.
The message I received said this ‘I don’t dance around the perimeter of the person I want to be; I step in fully and completely.’
It is so in tune with how I’m feeling, and the personal growth work I’m doing at the moment - perfect! So, bearing in mind that had my wandering throne delivered last week I decided I needed to mark the occasion and go all out with a crown. I’ve bought myself a really cute little silver one to symbolise this new level of Queendom that I’m moving towards.
Reclaiming the throne
I’ve actually been reclaiming my throne and crown for around 10 years now. It’s an ongoing journey and sometimes I make strides then things settle for a while. That’s when the onion layer starts off all bright and shiny (visualise a lovely red onion, that’s actually purple, as you are reading this) and eventually over time will lose the freshness and lustre. It dries and sheds. This is the levelling up phase. Each layer takes you closer and closer to your core and who you truly are.
This journey started as I was going through a complex traumatic period of my life. I had hot rock bottom but still had a little flame of fire inside me that wasn’t ready to be snuffed out completely. It was then when I experienced some very powerful Reiki healing. I had a lot of shit to get rid of in my life and it came out, literally! I was fearful of moving away from the toilet for 6 days in total! Apparently, this *can* happen but please don’t think it *always* happens. It was just my way of releasing the stagnant, unwanted energy of built-up emotion in my body. I was letting go.
Soon after that I went through the level 1 course and also developed my love of the oracle cards which I still use often. The cards help me connect with my intuition and I turn to them if I ever want to get clarity around a situation. They help me reflect on an emotional level and sometimes provide a starting point for journaling.
I’ve also read some brilliant, powerful books, by strong women that have helped me along my Queendom journey. Here are just a few that I’ve listened to on Audible and have made a lasting impression.
1. The Audacity to be Queen: The Unapologetic Art of Dreaming Big and Manifesting Your Most Fabulous Life -Gina DeVee
The days of dismissing ourselves and our desires end here. No longer must we pretend to be anything other than brilliant, capable, and fabulous. The world needs women like us to own our power, raise our standards and contribute our talents like never before. When a woman chooses to be a Queen everyone benefits. Only from the position of Queen can you fulfil your calling, and in this pivotal moment, time is of the essence. The age of Queen is now.
2. How to Own the Room: Women and the Art of Brilliant Speaking – Viv Groskop
In this book she talks about happy high status, which to me, sounds like the state I describe as ‘comfydent’ i.e. comfortable and confident in the situation or environment. It’s what I support people to do using colour and clothes as the vehicle. It’s about minimising self-doubt and showing up as the best version of you without arrogance.
3. The Universe Has Your Back: Transform Fear into Faith – Gabrielle Bernstein
Gabrielle says, "My commitment with this book is to wake up as many people as possible to their connection to faith and joy. In that connection, we can be guided to our true purpose: to be love and spread love. These words can no longer be cute buzz phrases that we merely post on social media. Rather, these words must be our mission. The happiness, safety, and security we long for lies in our commitment to love." Follow the secrets revealed in this book to unleash the presence of your power.
4. Work Like Woman – Mary Portas
This book is about changing workplace culture away from the outdated alpha male model. It’s about values, collaboration, embracing trust and flexibility. It’s also about not being something you’re not just to fit in. Worth a read even if you are a solopreneur.
5. Untamed : Stop Pleasing, Start Living – Glennon Doyle
This is a personal memoir and is the story of how each of us can begin to trust ourselves enough to set boundaries, make peace with our bodies, honour our anger and heartbreak, and unleash our truest, wildest instincts so that we become women who can finally look at ourselves and say: There She Is. Untamed shows us how to be brave. As Glennon insists: The braver we are, the luckier we get.
6. You Are Badass: How to Stop Doubting Your Greatness and Start Living an Awesome Life – Jen Sincero (and her other Badass books too)
Identify and change the self-sabotaging beliefs and behaviours that stop you from getting what you want. Create a life you totally love. And create it NOW. By the end of You Are a Badass, you'll understand why you are how you are, how to love what you can't change, how to change what you don't love, and how to use The Force to kick some serious ass.
Are you ready?
Other steps I’ve taken to commemorate this phase is to have so a few awesome items of clothing that will all aid comfydence as I take to my throne. One thing in particular would give Shirley Bassey a run for her money. I’ve bought the most gorgeously soft velvet wrap dress that is covered in sequins, hot pink of course! I think I’ll probably alter it and wear it as a long jacket. I can’t wait to wear it. I’ve hung it on my bedroom mirror so I can keep looking at it and I’ve tried it on about 6 times lol. It’s definitely one for my next photo shoot planned for the spring.
So, my lovely readers, as usual I hope this has given you food for thought. Are you ready to take your own journey to Queendom? You know where I am if you need a helping hand. Book a quick chat here.
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