Posts tagged “confidence”

Why are you the person to help me with colours, clothes and confidence Lisa? 
I've been involved with colour, make up, textiles and fashion since the early 80's...thankfully I've kept up with the times and won't make you wear shoulder pads or dress like Bananarama though! 
 
My skills, knowledge and experience have been honed over 30+ years...but more than that I'm compassionate and approachable. 
 
I am not the fashion police and I'm not into giving someone a makeover so they look nice for that day but can't replicate it for everyday life - I like to teach my tips and tricks around colour and style so you look good and feel fab every day. 
 
I am not really interested in who wore what at the Oscars. 
I don't watch Love Island or Towie and know who the "celebrities" are, nor am I interested in what they are wearing. 
I don't buy magazines or follow the latest "must have" trends, nor do I regurgitate it in "how to wear this season's pleated skirt" type articles to share with my followers. 
I don't do "makeovers" and show before and after photos of my clients. 
I don't make my clients wear colours or clothes that they don't like or feel comfortable in. 
I'm not a franchisee with a training manual and a few days training on the basics 
I do...help my clients define and refine their personal style/image so they feel fabulous and are truly expressing their identity; confident in the knowledge that they are still themselves but an upgraded version. 
It’s lunchtime, Wednesday 17 October, I’d been out to a networking coffee morning, Paul had been pottering at home on a day off. 
We’d eaten lunch and were chatting about this and that. It was an ordinary day. Paul was clearing up the lunch pots one minute and the next he was down on one knee asking me to marry him! It wasn’t one of those grand gesture pre-planned proposals, it was very spontaneous and from the heart. Of course, without hesitation, I said yes! Ten minutes later he’d left to do the school run and I was sitting at the kitchen table letting it sink in! 
 
We decided to tie the knot sooner rather than later and the date was set. Then we had lots of decisions to make…including the dreaded WHAT TO WEAR!!!???!!! 
 
I started to think about what I might like to wear to get married in and like any self-respecting bride set about creating a Pinterest board and looking for ideas. I pinned everything that I liked and began to see patterns forming. It was becoming obvious what I liked and there were themes emerging…so far so good. 
 
Then I had a rethink, I changed my mind and went off in a totally different direction. I got a picture in my head of EXACTLY what I wanted. This, of course, does not exist on ANY Pinterest boards, only in my head. I realise that this dress is going to have to be a bespoke creation and set about researching the typical cost with a seamstress. 
 
At this point I had a word with myself and decided that for the type of dress I wanted I was more than capable of making it myself. besides which I'm 54 and it's a second wedding fo both of us blah,blah, blah... I just needed to find the right pattern and get my sewing machine serviced. 
Opinions are like a***holes – we’ve all got one. 
Do you have a friend who has something to say about anything and everything? And who likes to share it with anyone and everyone. 
 
They like the sound of their own voice. 
 
I get invited onto local TV and radio occasionally to give my opinions on topics, sometimes it’s stuff in the news, other times it’s local interest stuff, sometimes they ask me to talk about what I do and the reasons and benefits behind certain things such as the 21 Day Style Challenge, Glum to Glam workshops, the charity Swish clothes swaps that I organise etc. 
 
For some of the light-hearted topics it’s easy to provide an opinion and chat easily about stuff. Other times when it’s a bit heavier I’m aware that I might sit on the fence slightly, hedging my bets, being diplomatic one might say. The other guest I was on with last week asked me if I was one of those controversial type guests. I’m not. But I have been on several times with that type. 
 
I find myself being a bit cautious about being controversial and alienating people – you never know who might be watching. 
 
Perhaps it’s a potential client who likes the cut of my jib and is thinking they might like to find out more about me and potentially visit my website – I don’t want to go off on one and come across as it’s my way or highway. This would be totally off brand for me. It’s important that I walk my walk and talk my talk at all times. 
I first met Sue in 2014, she was out of love with her wardrobe and was often stressed about what to wear. Not any more! Read about Sue's journey as she's defined and refined her personal style, colours and image over the past few years. Definitely a sucess story. Here she is answering questions posed by my Style Sisterhood Community (free FB Group)
1. What type of thing have you done with Lisa?  
(A) Colour analysis (in person) 
(B) 5 steps workshop (twice)  
3 x 21 day online style challenges 
 
2. What actually happens?  
(A) Lisa chatted to me about what I do, my social/leisure as well as work, why I felt I wanted my colours done, what I felt I might get out of the process, what wardrobe challenges I had or issues with clothes, how I felt about my clothes & whether I liked shopping for clothes, where I shopped etc. 
 
3. How did you feel before?  
(A) A bit nervous. I had met Lisa before through networking but I was really keen to know more about what she did & how she could help me. 
 
4. How did you feel during the process?  
(A) Relaxed & we had a few laughs too 
 
5. How did you feel afterwards?  
(A) Amazed & enlightened. Much more confident that the clothes we had edited for my wardrobe were suited to my colour palette. NB Further work in  
(B) helped me understand my Own Style & why some of these 'me colour' clothes still didn't feel right on me! This has been a gradual education process & I am still learning all the time. 
 
 
Self- Image Demons 
 
Do you talk to yourself (maybe out loud or in your head) sometimes but not in a nice way? Does your inner critic say nasty things to you as you get ready for a night out? You’re trying a new top on that you really liked in the shop, it’s a bit more colourful than you’re used to or maybe it’s a different style that you’ve not tried before…you aren’t 100% sure and need a bit of reassurance that you look nice. 
Then those little voices start in your head. The self -image demons can be proper nasty little buggers with viper tongues, making vile and vicious comments. They’re evil, they know too well about all the things we’re not sure about, they play on our insecurities and affect our self-confidence. 
 
Whiney, Nasty Bitch 
 
I recently asked in my online community, the Style Sisterhood group on Facebook, about the kind of things SID* (Self Image Demons) might say. Most of the responses would be deemed horrid and offensive if we ever actually said them to anyone else…we’d be seen as a whiney, nasty bitch on the attack. 
What size is PLUS Size? In Nov 2015 I put it out there in various social media groups that I belong to and asked ”at what size do you consider plus size to start?” 
My question was for market research purposes, not to be controversial or start a debate. Someone had suggested I ought to use the term in my marketing and was curious to see what people thought. I got quite a few responses and it seems to be a subject that ruffles feathers and divides opinion. Some people find the term offensive, mean and rude, others see it as an alternative term for unhealthy. 
 
Is it a classification or an insult? 
I personally don’t like it but it seems to be the recognised term within the fashion industry. If I’m looking for clothes online I Google ‘plus size’. The answers I got ranged from size 14 upwards but most people thought size 20 was the starting point. Is it just a term to describe a body shape? Like short, tall, athletic, curvy etc? Some of the people who responded were apologetic, as if they were worried about offending people. Others thought it might be better to use terms that seem less derogatory. 
 
Are you normal? 
I wonder why it is seen as a negative term? If you look for the dictionary definition of the word plus it has quite positive connotations… Advantage, asset, higher end of the scale, extra, a perk, prerequisite. It also says it can refer to larger than normal size in women’s clothing. What’s normal? Is it the same as average? Because the average woman in the UK is a size 16, 5ft 3″ and weighs 11 stone apparently. 
Do you know Tryer Tracey? She’s always on a diet of one kind or another.  
She’s tried WeightWatchers, Slimming World, Rosemary Conley, 5:2, the F Plan, Cambridge, Lighter Life, Cabbage Soup, Dukan, Paleo, Slimfast, Atkins…you name it. She’s even been for hypnotherapy, had her thyroid checked, wonders if she’s got a slow metabolism and heavy bones…Bless her, it doesn’t matter what she tries, she can lose weight but then just can’t keep it off. But you know what? She’ll never give up trying because she REALLY wants to lose weight....She wants to lose weight so much she’d do anything, but life keeps getting in the way.. 
 
It’s October now, it’s half term next week and she’ll have the kids off school. They’ll need entertaining, that means days out and treats, they love pizza hut and the lunchtime deal is really good, the dough balls are delicious too. She’ll just have the salad though (those bacon bits make it worth it) and a diet coke, then perhaps nick a slice off the kids. The kids have pick and mix at the cinema but she resists and just has popcorn because that’s better for you. 
Halloween is a nightmare these days too! Where did the trick or treat thing and big parties come from? She just had a hollowed out swede as a Jack O’ Lantern when she was a kid. 
 
The supermarkets don’t help either, putting those big tins of chocolates on offer. She buys them to give to the kids on the estate when they come knocking –one of them is just full of empty wrappers by the 28th. It’s just the odd one here and there with a coffee and before you know it – gone. The tins are getting smaller every year though too. 
I’m in a really supportive coaching group. It’s run by a woman who really walks her walk and talks her talk.  
I really admire her integrity and passion and want to emulate her business model. She has completely nailed the know, like and trust factor in my eyes and I am happy to invest my hard earned cash with her for my current business development needs.I have recommended her to many friends and other women in business because she comes across as very real and truly authentic. I want to be like her in business. 
 
She hosted a conference earlier this week in Manchester. It was amazing and I came away totally inspired...bloody knackered but energised at the same time. She had a guest speaker who also has the same qualities (another very successful business woman in her own right) who has been coached by her for the past 18 months and is living proof that being true to yourself and your potential clients’ works. She generated £30k of business in August!!!She was telling us that her goal not that long ago was to bring in £400 a month to pay the Aldi bill and put petrol in the car... 
 
These two role models had a roomful of women in business at the conference – so it’s not just me being creepy or having some kind of weird girl crush. They both have literally thousands of followers on Facebook and some of us were there yesterday to listen and take inspiration from them and each other. It was in a nice hotel, proper conference facilities and everything. There was quite serious group of ‘business men and women’ in the next room having their own conference – they were all suited and booted and ‘looked the part’. There was not one business suit in our room – we probably weren’t the usual type of conference delegates they get, treading on their soft carpets and eating the pastries presented with the morning coffee...why am I telling you this??? 
 
 
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