Ditching the News, Golden Handcuffs & the Naysayers
Curate your world
I don’t watch the news, I stopped a few years ago. It was at a time when I felt like I’d had enough negative shit going on in my life. It didn’t make sense to be actively inviting more misery, pain and suffering into my life when I could switch it off at the flick of a button. It felt like self-preservation. It’s depressing. I’ve never felt the need to go back to it either. I can pick up enough about what’s going on in the world without it invading my home several times a day.
I’ve curated my world to be Lisa friendly in many ways. I’m no longer at home to things that don’t serve me. I have clearer boundaries and a lot more self-awareness. I’m discerning about how I spend my time and who with.
My friendship circle has morphed over the years. I pick and choose who I invite into my inner circle and who I spend my time with. I’ve learned to protect my inner peace on the whole. I’m not interested in conversations with naysayers or mood hoovers. I’m full of gratitude that I’m surrounded, on the whole, by people who add to my life rather than drain from it. I’m a different person to who I was twenty or even ten years ago. I’ve moved on. I’ve changed. I’ve grown. I never want to be that person who people say ‘she’s not changed’ as if it’s a good thing!
Get a 'little job'
It can be hard to let go of friendships or relationships that are no longer on the same page as you. If they’re not with you for the ride though they can hold you back. When I’d made the decision to become my own boss about ten years ago, I had a friend who was not very supportive. She couldn’t understand why I didn’t get a ‘little job’ to tide me over rather than put 100% effort into my business. Did she not realise I was meant for so much more? Lol.
Whereas MY way of thinking was that if I didn’t back my self fully and only put in 50% effort, I wouldn’t achieve my goals. If I couldn’t believe my business was going to be a success, why would anyone else? She made no secret of the fact that she thought I’d lost the plot. I distanced myself from that relationship over time. It was necessary for me to not hang around with people who weren’t on my side and didn’t want me to win.
My light was shining too brightly for her eyes. I was not going to forgo playing all out or shrink myself to try and keep her or anyone else happy. Not all relationships aren’t meant to last forever. Sometimes though, you will meet people who you connect with on a different level. You are likeminded souls, and they were always meant to be part of your life. You just click, you feel like you ‘see’ each other, and it doesn’t matter that you’ve not actually known each other all that long, but you ‘know’ each other. Your values are aligned and there’s a mutual respect and trust right from the minute you get chatting. These are your soul friends.
Like attracts like
I shuffled my Miracles Now cards by Gabrielle Bernstein that sit on my desk, and this is what came out today.
‘To travel further on my path of personal growth, I call on my spiritual running buddies for help.’
It makes sense to hang around with people you have things in common with and that might change over time if you are growing and changing. You have a choice. You cannot be mad at people if they aren’t who you’d like them to be and coming along for the ride with you. Just because you are growing and changing doesn’t mean they are going to.
"You are the average of the five people you spend the most time with.” According to Jim Rohn. So, therefore, if you have ambition and aspirations to do more with your life you are more likely to be successful if you hang around with likeminded people. It’s easier to go with the flow than against it. It makes sense to give yourself the best possible chance to succeed. Like attracts like, birds of a feather flock together etc. you want people in your life with similar beliefs and attitudes. Don’t allow other people’s complacency or lack of ambition filter into your life so that it stops you achieving your potential.
Choose radiators over drains
Curate your social media feeds with people who are radiators rather than drain you. Actively construct your environment. You want to make it as easy for yourself as possible to propel yourself forward rather than have people holding you back. Use the unfollow button freely for those friends who aren’t adding to your life. Follow public figures who you admire, join their Facebook groups and mailing lists so you have their energy in your inbox too. Put your own thoughts out there too, let the right people find you by talking about your beliefs and feelings. Post articles on LinkedIn or blogs on your website to gather your tribe with a similar mindset.
You always have options. Once you realise this you can start to take action. It can be tough to get started though. You may have got sidetracked from your true calling. You might be feeling trapped, as if you have no choice. I felt like that for many years. I felt like I’d got golden handcuffs of a regular salary, earning more than I’d earned before, a great pension package, 8 weeks annual leave a year plus all the other benefits of a ‘proper job’. Sometimes it takes a great big memo from the universe to knock you for six to set you back on your actual path. The lessons will keep being repeated until you learn from them. How many sleepless nights and stress filled days was it going to take before I got back on my true path?
You are in charge
It took a friend asking me this question, when my life was in tatters, to flip the switch for me. ‘What would you do if you could do absolutely anything? What would make your heart sing?’ That was the day I realised I had a choice. What I wasn’t changing I was choosing. You can choose to stay in the rut, be in victim mode or you can take action to make the change. It’s not enough to just want things to be different, you have to be motivated to make the changes and take courageous action yourself. You are the only person who can decide that there’s more to life and start to manifest your desires. Ditch the naysayers, switch off the news, surround yourself with people who get it, and you are more likely to achieve your goals.
FAB Business Club : female authentic ballsy
As such the FAB Business Club is where I choose to hang out these days. It might be just the place for you too. Why not come along to one of our meetings in December to see if we are a good fit. We have online meetings the 7th and 21st which I can give you a free ticket for – just get in touchl. Otherwise, if you can get to Nottingham on the 13th we are meeting F2F.
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