Your Non Negotiable Thing
I had a memory pop up on Facebook, 1 November 2011 and I’d done 300 days as a non-smoker, proud to have broken my own record. Apart from giving up when I was pregnant this was the longest time I’d not smoked for since I was 14! (It will be my 10-year anniversary 6th January 2021.)
Stopping smoking actually came about because I was going into hospital for a hip replacement and there was no way I'd be able to nip out for a fag. I had two packets with me 'just in case' though. I remember one had 3 left in it and the other was full and unopened. I’d told myself that I'd just see how long I could manage without one, but if I was desperate, they were in my handbag.
My life for the next 3-4 months was going to be recovering from the surgery, lots of reading and watching daytime telly. I managed 6 weeks before I cracked.
I had my sister to stay, then my mum and they looked after me really well during my first few weeks of recovery...then, once I was more mobile and hobbling around on the crutches, all of a sudden I was home alone and felt lonely.
I was trying to do something on the PC, and it went 'wrong', I got frustrated and felt sorry for myself. My fags were in a cupboard by the back door and I sparked up through the tears. One puff and I had a word with myself! I recall saying out loud to myself 'Lisa wtf are you doing?' I threw the cigarette down and haven't touched one since.
For 32 years cigarettes had ruled my life to a certain degree. I was a proper Fag Ash Lil.
They'd punctuated my day and cig breaks were something I had to plan in and make time for - especially once you couldn't smoke indoors. I ALWAYS had to make sure that I had enough money in my purse for cigarettes, they were a priority above all else.
How mad was that? These things that were proven to kill people were a BIG focus of my day - smoking was NON-NEGOTIABLE. It's got me thinking...what do I place such importance these days??
Do I spend time on myself EVERY day doing something really important, something non-negotiable, something that would be good for me? No, I don't think I do 100%, although I do have VERY good intentions. I could always manage to prioritise cigarettes though; something is wrong this story!
I am SO much better at it these days but things I know I ought to prioritise as self-care are often the things that get pushed to the back of the queue in my busy life juggling a business and my home life. For me it's stuff like seeing my friends, reading for pleasure and just pampering stuff like having a relaxing bath. I’m pleased to say I’ve been making much more of a concerted effort recently though as lockdown, no holidays and working too much were starting to take their toll.
I know that I'm not alone in not prioritising myself.
Most of my clients come to me because they've got to a point in their lives where they are fed up with putting themselves at the back of the queue. They feel like they're in a rut. They often feel like they've lost their identity somewhere along the way - usually it's because their priority has been looking after the family and they've had no time for themselves. Or it might be their body shape has changed or they experience a major life event like losing a parent, redundancy, workplace trauma or divorce
On the whole they are feeling a bit fed up with wearing the same old stuff because it's easy. They often feel like they are just blending into the background and aren't reflecting what's on the inside because they still feel young at heart.
They have faced up to the fact that they can’t do it on their own and need a helping hand. They’ve been trying. They’ve read the books and the blogs, the magazines; they’ve watched the YouTube videos and followed the bloggers on Instagram. They’ve seen loads of ideas but mostly of things that are not quite right for them.
All my clients really want is to just look nice and feel good in their clothes rather than it all be a bit trial and error. They’re so done with the experimenting and not really being 100% whether or not it actually works for them. They want to KNOW for sure and DRESS WITH CONFIDENCE. To be able to DITCH THE DOUBT and clamber out of the rut they’ve found themselves in, acknowledging that they need a helping hand.
They all have different ‘final straw’ moments that have made them bite the bullet and value themselves enough to make the call. For some it’s been business related. They recognise that in order to step up in their career they need to be more visible, putting themselves out there on social media. For others it’s more to do self-worth and putting themselves first for a change.
They’ve finally become their own NON-NEGOTIABLE project.
My Drab to FAB! 4 step system can be accessed as blended approach of self-study, 1:1 and group coaching with me. You can achieve results immediately as you start to implement my teachings. My clients achieve AWESOME RESULTS.
If you’ve been thinking you’ll wait until you’ve lost weight, the decorating is finished or all those other things that are getting in your way I’d just seize the day and get yourself signed up and you will be CELEBRATING Christmas feeling AWESOME.
I’d love to help you transform from drab to FAB, meh to MAGNIFICENT, ok to OMG and catapult your CONFIDENCE – You know it makes sense.
p.s. Obviously, don’t just take my word for it – here’s what one of my recent clients said...
"Before working with Lisa I had a wardrobe full of clothes, but typically nothing to wear! I was waiting for a magic day when everything would make sense again/or I’d feel good about what I put on.
Lack of self confidence in my clothes decision making meant I wasn’t sure that an online course would address my worries. I thought only face to face would work- how wrong I was proved to be. The first 15-minute conversation and the website stories convinced me that Lisa would make a difference to my dilemmas.
The process of working with Lisa has been supportive, energising, inclusive and confidence building. She’s extremely knowledgeable and inspiring; a real woman offering advice and support to other real women. Videos and workbook well planned and paced and because they’re online you can work at a time and speed that suits you and revisit them, which I think is a real bonus compared to a day face to face session. Lisa is very friendly and motivating, nudging you into making changes, without you feeling undermined. The Facebook group and forum are both an excellent idea, as there was a genuine sense of learning together and support.
The best results so far have been I feel I own my clothes when I wear them again now and with that empowerment comes increased self-confidence and self-worth. I realised that I didn’t need to wait for a ‘magic’ day in the future when my body changed/ someone invented clothes shop just for me. I could make informed choices, with colours and styles that made me feel better, which meant I was complimented more often. But the compliments were just a lovely by product, the most important thing was I got my mojo back and it feels good to be me again. I’m wearing colours I wouldn’t have considered in the past and know that I still have an online community that is supportive and honest.
Any new purchases I now make I know are right for me, so I don’t waste money just buying things to take home which then hang in my wardrobe for years without being worn! Styling outfits around key pieces is easier, although still work in progress. Spending money on acquiring better knowledge and making me feel better has been money so well spent.
I’d describe Lisa's system as a programme for real women, to support them in feeling fabulous. It’s like taking a friendly, stylish, colour expert sister with you on a wardrobe discovery, that leaves you with the confidence to make the best future wardrobe for yourself. Thank you very much, it’s been a fabulous experience."
If any of this resonates why not book in for a quick chat with me, let's see which will be the best way for you to get your style mojo back. Check my calendar here.
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